The 'Yes' Rule – Avoiding the Correction Trap
The Impactful Academy article says to 'validate' feelings, but what do I do when my grandpa asks when my grandma is coming home? She passed away ten years ago. It feels like I'm lying if I don't tell him the truth.
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This is one of the hardest parts of dementia communication techniques, and you’re not alone in feeling conflicted. In many cases, telling the full truth can cause fresh grief each time, as if they’re hearing it for the first time. Instead, many caregivers use “validation” or gentle redirection—responding to the emotion rather than correcting the fact. You might say, “You miss her a lot, don’t you?” and shift to a comforting memory. It’s not about lying, but reducing distress and meeting them where they are. There are helpful ways to talk to them that explain this approach more clearly.